Oh, how many times God has reminded me of this.
He brings me back to stillness so often.
Most of the time, I think of the command to be still as a call to get rid of distractions. A call to purify my life of the busyness, to stop and listen. Let God's voice flow into my life and speak.
It is a hard thing to do.
But this week, when God said to me, "My child, be still," it seemed to mean an entirely different thing to my heart.
This time, God asked me to be still in a new way.
Because for a while now, I have been carrying around a lot of responsibility and guilt with me. It has managed to creep up slowly, telling me that it is my duty to make people happy. To take care of big needs, to release those hurts, to take care of that sadness. Slowly, the responsibility of another's wellbeing piled on, week after week in these last few months, until I had reached the point of exhaustion.
Because I can't do it.
No matter how much I try or how badly I want to, I cannot fulfill another person. I cannot fill an emptiness that only God can fill.
And when I came to Him, this tender God we serve, and said through angry tears; I. HAVE. NOTHING. LEFT.
He whispered to me, "My child. Be Still."
He said, "Let it go. This responsibility is too big for someone like you. This is the job for someone much stronger, much kinder, and someone with much more understanding.
Be still. Give this responsibility to me.
Trust. I have him. I love him. I am working on him.
He. Is. Mine.
I am taking care of this.
Just like I'm taking care of you."
My friends, God knows us. More than we can ever begin to understand. And he knows those around us too. The ones we love so dearly. He carries all of us, watches over us, and loves us with abandon.
And He will not let us fall.
We can only do what God has equipped us for. Love.
We cannot save.
That is God's job.
And He does it well.
Rest in that.
Be still in that.