also.

i wanted
the past to go away, i wanted
to leave it, like another country; i wanted
my life to close, and open
like a hinge, like a wing, like the part of the song
where it falls
down over the rocks: an explosion, a discovery;
i wanted
to hurry into the work of my life; i wanted to know,
whoever i was, i was

alive
for a little while.

***

also i wanted
to be able to love. and we all know
how that one goes,
don't we?

slowly.

mary oliver.