"The God of our fathers has chosen you to know his will and to see the Righteous One and to hear words from His mouth." -- (Ananias to Paul, following his conversion on the Damascus Road).
-----
First. Wow. What a thing to be told.
The God of our fathers has chosen you to:
1. know His will. 2. see the Righteous One. 3. hear words from His mouth.
-----
BOOM.
-----
That's big news.
And to receive it only a day after meeting Jesus Himself on the road?
Big stuff. Scary stuff. Awesome stuff. Momentous Stuff.
-----
The power of what was promised to Paul struck me so much that I wanted to understand the fullness of it, so I looked up some of the words in their original Hebrew, and I found this:
The word used for will in the passage is "thelema," meaning will, desire, choice, determination. The description goes on to explain the word more fully with the following:
"Thelema means, then, will, not to be conceived as demand, but as an expression or inclination of pleasure; a want or desire which pleases and creates joy. When it denotes God's will, it signifies His gracious disposition toward something. Used to designate what God Himself does of His own good pleasure."
-----
Ummm. Whoa.
Just look at those words.
Desire. Joy. Gracious disposition. His own good Pleasure.
-----
So, then, the passage could be read like this:
The God of our fathers has chosen you to know His desire.
The God of our fathers has chosen you to know His Joy.
The God of our fathers has chosen you to know His gracious disposition.
The God of our fathers has chosen you to know His own good pleasure.
-----
Wow. God delights in me on my journey.
Wow. He walks with me because he enjoys it.
Wow. He stays near because it brings Him joy.
Wow. His will for me is His own good pleasure for me.
-----
Whoa.
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa.
-----
Thanks be to God for taking pleasure in our journeys.
I'm so grateful He allows me to be part of the adventure, a part of the joy.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Suffering.
-----
"May the Lord direct our hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance." -- thessalonians.
-----
Amen.
"May the Lord direct our hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance." -- thessalonians.
-----
Amen.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Light.
Today was a hard day.
(well, at least it started out that way).
This morning, for whatever reason, I was hit hard by a lot of fears, and I found myself struggling to feel God's hope. Life felt heavy, life felt scary, and everything seemed dark.
So. I prayed for some light.
I huddled on my bed, I cried, and I made this little request:
God, please. I need some LIGHT today. send me some light.
And then, after making that small request, I sat myself up and proceeded to check my Facebook page.
(I know, I know).
And it turns out that during the five minutes I was saying my prayer, my friend MP had written me a little FB message. Interestingly enough, just two days before I had told MP that her heart was like a window to God's light for me, free and open and bright - so it was pretty interesting and appropriate that she was the person to write me (God.is.so.good).
Her message said this:
i'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. -- e.e.cummings // can i getta amen, sister Sarah Hamm? they say crazy, i say trust.
They say crazy (and believe me, this is pretty normal feedback lately), I say trust. Bingo.
-----
LIGHT #1. Stay brave in my trust. All resources are God's. A step of faith sometimes looks crazy/unpractical/naive to the world, but that doesn't mean that it is. The vision will come, it will not delay. God did not give me a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power and of love. He leads me to green pastures. I have no need to worry. The.Lord.is.my.shepherd. I SHALL NOT want. He will astound me with wonder upon wonder. He clothes the lilies of the fields, why not me? They say crazy. I say, TRUST.
-----
Later that afternoon:
I got a letter in the mail from my friend Anna. It had been delayed because I recently moved. It was originally mailed June 7, 2010. It should have gotten to me much sooner than it did. But God knows His timing (blessed be His name). In this letter, my friend talked about Psalm 23 - how when the kids from her school recited it she could feel that the promise was true - that the WORD of God never returns void, that the truth of Psalm 23 would be stored in those kids' hearts, and that through it God would be given glory.
And then she quoted for me pieces of Psalm 37:
Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
-----
LIGHT #2. God's Word never returns void. It is living, it is active, it separates bone from marrow. It is alive and relevant and powerful to my circumstances. It offers so much light, in and of itself. I am to delight in the Lord. When I do so, and only then, my desires will line up with His. God offers me safe pasture, always. God lays out land for me, a place for me to dwell. I am never without a home. And all of this is for HIS glory.
-----
Later that night (tonight):
Old friends are in town for my sister's wedding. I got to spend a few minutes with some of them tonight. One of them, a fellow blogger and one of the funniest people I know, had a present waiting for me. I unwrapped said present to find two of the coolest things a bag can contain: A book and a coffee mug.
But this was no ordinary book and coffee mug, this was a book and coffee mug crafted around my own personal desires, my very own heart. This was a gift from God.
The first present, the book, is titled "Just say Nu, Yiddish for every occasion (when English just won't do)." Incredible. I jumped up and down from joy. The second present, the coffee mug, is chocolate-colored and has beautiful HEBREW writing on it. I almost couldn't believe it - I have been on the lookout for a coffee mug with Hebrew writing for months now. It was one of my those desires of mine - a desire of my heart.
So no. This was no ordinary present - no ordinary book and coffee mug.
This book and coffee mug were LIGHT.
-----
LIGHT #3. God loves in the most amazing and intimate ways. He is a romancer of my heart. He knows me, He sees me, and He hears my prayers. He rushes in to take care. Even in the very small things, He is fully present. In the desert, His still small voice allures, speaks tenderly. He longs to show me compassion. He delights in me.
-----
1. 2. 3.
light. light. light.
-----
God's love is so amazing.
Again and again, I am blown away by the power and the nearness of it - its ability to rush in and surprise me.
This God of ours hears our prayers. He uplifts our souls and sets them free. He illuminates life's details and romances our hearts - deeply. personally. faithfully.
-----
So tonight, I want to thank Him.
-----
God of Glory, blessed King, lover of souls:
I thank you.praise you.glorify you.
for Your
incredible gift of
LIGHT.
-----
-----
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the maker of heaven and earth.
-----
Baruch Ha-Shem.
(well, at least it started out that way).
This morning, for whatever reason, I was hit hard by a lot of fears, and I found myself struggling to feel God's hope. Life felt heavy, life felt scary, and everything seemed dark.
So. I prayed for some light.
I huddled on my bed, I cried, and I made this little request:
God, please. I need some LIGHT today. send me some light.
And then, after making that small request, I sat myself up and proceeded to check my Facebook page.
(I know, I know).
And it turns out that during the five minutes I was saying my prayer, my friend MP had written me a little FB message. Interestingly enough, just two days before I had told MP that her heart was like a window to God's light for me, free and open and bright - so it was pretty interesting and appropriate that she was the person to write me (God.is.so.good).
Her message said this:
i'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. -- e.e.cummings // can i getta amen, sister Sarah Hamm? they say crazy, i say trust.
They say crazy (and believe me, this is pretty normal feedback lately), I say trust. Bingo.
-----
LIGHT #1. Stay brave in my trust. All resources are God's. A step of faith sometimes looks crazy/unpractical/naive to the world, but that doesn't mean that it is. The vision will come, it will not delay. God did not give me a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power and of love. He leads me to green pastures. I have no need to worry. The.Lord.is.my.shepherd. I SHALL NOT want. He will astound me with wonder upon wonder. He clothes the lilies of the fields, why not me? They say crazy. I say, TRUST.
-----
Later that afternoon:
I got a letter in the mail from my friend Anna. It had been delayed because I recently moved. It was originally mailed June 7, 2010. It should have gotten to me much sooner than it did. But God knows His timing (blessed be His name). In this letter, my friend talked about Psalm 23 - how when the kids from her school recited it she could feel that the promise was true - that the WORD of God never returns void, that the truth of Psalm 23 would be stored in those kids' hearts, and that through it God would be given glory.
And then she quoted for me pieces of Psalm 37:
Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
-----
LIGHT #2. God's Word never returns void. It is living, it is active, it separates bone from marrow. It is alive and relevant and powerful to my circumstances. It offers so much light, in and of itself. I am to delight in the Lord. When I do so, and only then, my desires will line up with His. God offers me safe pasture, always. God lays out land for me, a place for me to dwell. I am never without a home. And all of this is for HIS glory.
-----
Later that night (tonight):
Old friends are in town for my sister's wedding. I got to spend a few minutes with some of them tonight. One of them, a fellow blogger and one of the funniest people I know, had a present waiting for me. I unwrapped said present to find two of the coolest things a bag can contain: A book and a coffee mug.
But this was no ordinary book and coffee mug, this was a book and coffee mug crafted around my own personal desires, my very own heart. This was a gift from God.
The first present, the book, is titled "Just say Nu, Yiddish for every occasion (when English just won't do)." Incredible. I jumped up and down from joy. The second present, the coffee mug, is chocolate-colored and has beautiful HEBREW writing on it. I almost couldn't believe it - I have been on the lookout for a coffee mug with Hebrew writing for months now. It was one of my those desires of mine - a desire of my heart.
So no. This was no ordinary present - no ordinary book and coffee mug.
This book and coffee mug were LIGHT.
-----
LIGHT #3. God loves in the most amazing and intimate ways. He is a romancer of my heart. He knows me, He sees me, and He hears my prayers. He rushes in to take care. Even in the very small things, He is fully present. In the desert, His still small voice allures, speaks tenderly. He longs to show me compassion. He delights in me.
-----
1. 2. 3.
light. light. light.
-----
God's love is so amazing.
Again and again, I am blown away by the power and the nearness of it - its ability to rush in and surprise me.
This God of ours hears our prayers. He uplifts our souls and sets them free. He illuminates life's details and romances our hearts - deeply. personally. faithfully.
-----
So tonight, I want to thank Him.
-----
God of Glory, blessed King, lover of souls:
I thank you.praise you.glorify you.
for Your
incredible gift of
LIGHT.
-----
-----
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the maker of heaven and earth.
-----
Baruch Ha-Shem.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Help. And thank you.
Anne Lamott says there are only two prayers a person needs to know:
help me help me help me
and
thank you thank you thank you.
-----
So.
-----
Lord -
help me help me help me to rest in the fact that all resources are yours.
and
thank you thank you thank you for always providing me with enough.
-----
-----
(It looks like Anne might be on to something here).
help me help me help me
and
thank you thank you thank you.
-----
So.
-----
Lord -
help me help me help me to rest in the fact that all resources are yours.
and
thank you thank you thank you for always providing me with enough.
-----
-----
(It looks like Anne might be on to something here).
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Favor.
Leah was not loved.
We remember her as the unfavored one.
In our minds she remains the unnattractive sister - unwanted by her husband.
It is the legacy we have given her.
-----
But that is only a small part of Leah's story, and certainly not how it ends - in fact, Leah has one of the most beautiful and incredible stories in all of the Bible, and one that can teach us a whole lot about who God is.
The part of Leah's story that we often miss comes after Jacob has been married to Rachel and Leah for quite some time (both 7 year work contracts have been completed). The Bible at this point in the story informs us that Jacob loved Rachel more than he did Leah. It goes even further to tell us that Leah was not loved by Jacob at all, in fact, the hebrew word that is used denotes a hatred or strong aversion towards someone.
The Bible makes it clear that Jacob didn't just mildly dislike Leah, he actually hated her.
-----
And so, God steps in. "When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he opened her womb" (gen. 29). Leah gets pregnant, has a son, and names him Reuben (meaning: he has seen my misery). She assumes, after giving birth to a son, that Jacob will begin to love her; "Surely my husband will love me now."
Leah assumes that God has blessed her with a child so that her husband will begin to love her.
But the Text implies that Jacob's feeling towards Leah do not change. She then conceives another child, who she names Simeon (meaning: the one who hears), deducing again that "Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too."
Apparently the favor of Jacob is a hard thing to earn, and despite bearing him two sons, Leah's cirumstances are still the same - she remains unloved by her husband. She conceives a third time, naming this son Levi (meaning: attached), thinking, "now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have bore him three sons."
Leah's desperation to be loved by her husband is so evident throughout her story. Like all of us tend to do, Leah seeks her validity and worth through human relationship. Leah hopes to be valued and chosen by her husband, and she sees God's blessing of sons as a means to that end. She desires so strongly to be looked on by another with desire and love, and despite all the time that has passed, she still hopes that Jacob's love will come.
But, again, the Text implies that it does not. After 3 sons, Leah remains unloved by her husband.
Once again, Leah bears a son, but something has changed this time. When her fourth son is born, Leah simply says, "This time I will praise the Lord." She then names her son Judah, meaning praise.
-----
Leah finally got it - she finally understood.
The whole time, Leah had been seeking love, and the whole time, Leah had been hoping to be validated and seen by her husband.
But by baby number four, I think she finally began to realize that from the beginning of the story, she had been seen - by God. From the very start, God has chosen her, God had cared for her, God had covered her with His love.
It wasn't about Jacob, it was about God.
-----
And the beautifiul thing about this story is that God did not bless Leah and give her sons and intervene in her life so that Jacob would love her.
God did it solely because He Himself loved her.
No goal in mind, no secret agenda, no strings attached.
God just loved Leah and wanted her to know it, so He showed her.
And once she realized that those four beautiful sons were simply a gift of love from a gracious God, her whole demeanor changed. Instead of rejection, there was gratitude.
The love of God changed her.
-----
(But wait, it gets even better...).
Do you want to know the most amazing part of this whole, beautiful story?
Out of the line of Leah - out of the line of Judah - comes Jesus.
JESUS.
Our Messiah, the promised One, traces His lineage back to Leah, the one we remember to be unfavored.
Unfavored? Friends, God lavished Leah with favor.
He saw her, he loved her desperately, and he esteemed her to a position of incredible honor.
Because that's what God is like. He SEES us. He FAVORS us. He CHOOSES us. He LOVES us desparately. And He ESTEEMS us to a place of honor, allowing us to be a part of the family of the One who was Promised.
That is what this is about.
This life of ours comes down to one thing and one thing only: we are desperately and deeply loved by a gracious God.
Nothing more, nothing less.
God loves us and He wants us to know it, so He births in us blessing upon blessing upon blessing upon blessing until we understand. He pours over us grace until we see. He looks upon us with favor until we realize.
He covers us with love
until we can say,
"this time I will praise the Lord."
We remember her as the unfavored one.
In our minds she remains the unnattractive sister - unwanted by her husband.
It is the legacy we have given her.
-----
But that is only a small part of Leah's story, and certainly not how it ends - in fact, Leah has one of the most beautiful and incredible stories in all of the Bible, and one that can teach us a whole lot about who God is.
The part of Leah's story that we often miss comes after Jacob has been married to Rachel and Leah for quite some time (both 7 year work contracts have been completed). The Bible at this point in the story informs us that Jacob loved Rachel more than he did Leah. It goes even further to tell us that Leah was not loved by Jacob at all, in fact, the hebrew word that is used denotes a hatred or strong aversion towards someone.
The Bible makes it clear that Jacob didn't just mildly dislike Leah, he actually hated her.
-----
And so, God steps in. "When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he opened her womb" (gen. 29). Leah gets pregnant, has a son, and names him Reuben (meaning: he has seen my misery). She assumes, after giving birth to a son, that Jacob will begin to love her; "Surely my husband will love me now."
Leah assumes that God has blessed her with a child so that her husband will begin to love her.
But the Text implies that Jacob's feeling towards Leah do not change. She then conceives another child, who she names Simeon (meaning: the one who hears), deducing again that "Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too."
Apparently the favor of Jacob is a hard thing to earn, and despite bearing him two sons, Leah's cirumstances are still the same - she remains unloved by her husband. She conceives a third time, naming this son Levi (meaning: attached), thinking, "now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have bore him three sons."
Leah's desperation to be loved by her husband is so evident throughout her story. Like all of us tend to do, Leah seeks her validity and worth through human relationship. Leah hopes to be valued and chosen by her husband, and she sees God's blessing of sons as a means to that end. She desires so strongly to be looked on by another with desire and love, and despite all the time that has passed, she still hopes that Jacob's love will come.
But, again, the Text implies that it does not. After 3 sons, Leah remains unloved by her husband.
Once again, Leah bears a son, but something has changed this time. When her fourth son is born, Leah simply says, "This time I will praise the Lord." She then names her son Judah, meaning praise.
-----
Leah finally got it - she finally understood.
The whole time, Leah had been seeking love, and the whole time, Leah had been hoping to be validated and seen by her husband.
But by baby number four, I think she finally began to realize that from the beginning of the story, she had been seen - by God. From the very start, God has chosen her, God had cared for her, God had covered her with His love.
It wasn't about Jacob, it was about God.
-----
And the beautifiul thing about this story is that God did not bless Leah and give her sons and intervene in her life so that Jacob would love her.
God did it solely because He Himself loved her.
No goal in mind, no secret agenda, no strings attached.
God just loved Leah and wanted her to know it, so He showed her.
And once she realized that those four beautiful sons were simply a gift of love from a gracious God, her whole demeanor changed. Instead of rejection, there was gratitude.
The love of God changed her.
-----
(But wait, it gets even better...).
Do you want to know the most amazing part of this whole, beautiful story?
Out of the line of Leah - out of the line of Judah - comes Jesus.
JESUS.
Our Messiah, the promised One, traces His lineage back to Leah, the one we remember to be unfavored.
Unfavored? Friends, God lavished Leah with favor.
He saw her, he loved her desperately, and he esteemed her to a position of incredible honor.
Because that's what God is like. He SEES us. He FAVORS us. He CHOOSES us. He LOVES us desparately. And He ESTEEMS us to a place of honor, allowing us to be a part of the family of the One who was Promised.
That is what this is about.
This life of ours comes down to one thing and one thing only: we are desperately and deeply loved by a gracious God.
Nothing more, nothing less.
God loves us and He wants us to know it, so He births in us blessing upon blessing upon blessing upon blessing until we understand. He pours over us grace until we see. He looks upon us with favor until we realize.
He covers us with love
until we can say,
"this time I will praise the Lord."
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
New blog, same blog.
To anyone who reads this blog, I'm moving Emet over to wordpress.
new address: http://searchforemet.wordpress.com/
Much love and God bless.
new address: http://searchforemet.wordpress.com/
Much love and God bless.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Severe.
"The Christian life is a life characterized by true and spontaneous creativity. Consequently, a disciple is subject to the same charge that was leveled against Jesus Christ, namely, the charge of inconsistency. But Jesus Christ was always consistent in His relationship to God, and a Christian must be consistent in his relationship to the life of the Son of God in him, not consistent to strict, unyielding doctrines. People pour themselves into their own doctrines, and God has to blast them out of their preconcieved ideas before they can become devoted to Jesus Christ." -- oswald chambers.
...
All I really know to say to this quote is "Amen."
(Oh, and one more thing):
Praise. the. Lord that at times His mercy is severe.
Praise the Lord when He drags us out of our boxes, forces us outside our lines, and is willing to make us really uncomfortable .
Praise the Lord for his work in us and its sometimes white hot intensity.
Yes, praise the Lord for it all.
For without His refining fire,
I would surely be lost.
...
All I really know to say to this quote is "Amen."
(Oh, and one more thing):
Praise. the. Lord that at times His mercy is severe.
Praise the Lord when He drags us out of our boxes, forces us outside our lines, and is willing to make us really uncomfortable .
Praise the Lord for his work in us and its sometimes white hot intensity.
Yes, praise the Lord for it all.
For without His refining fire,
I would surely be lost.
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